Parenting Tips

Do Your Children Take Care of Their Belongings?

From The Parents Guide: Solutions to Today's Most Common Behavior Problems in the Home by Stephen B. McCarney, Ed.D and Angela M. Bauer, M.Ed comes these tips on helping a child who does not take care of his/her belongings:

• Establish rules for taking care of belongings. These rules should be consistent and followed by everyone on the home. Talk about the rules often and reward your child for following the rules.
  
  
• Carefully consider your child's age and experience before expecting your child to take care or his/her belongings alone.
  
  
• Act as a model for taking care of belongings by doing so yourself.
  
  
• When your child does not take care of his/her belongings, explain exactly what they did wrong, what should have been done, and why. For example: You are driving into the driveway and your child's bike is blocking the way. Stop the car, get out, go to your child and say "You forgot to put your bike in the garage. You need to move your bike off the driveway and put it in the garage because it is blocking the driveway."
  
  
• Provide your child with a list of his/her belongings and the proper way to care for them.
  
  
• Make certain your child sees the relationship between his/her behavior and the consequences that follow. (e.g. failing to put belonging in its proper place may result in it being broken.)
  
  
• Allow natural consequences to occur due to your child not caring for his/her belongings. (e.g. the child's bike being stolen because it was not secured in the garage overnight.)
  
  
• Have your child place a star or check mark beside each belonging for which he/she takes proper care and allow your child to trade in the stars or check marks for rewards.
  
  
• Set aside time each day for everyone in the home to care for their belongings.
  
  
• Make sure that your child can reach the places where belongings should be stored when not in use.
  
  
• Let your child know that belongings not put in their proper places at the end of the day may be taken away for a period of time due to lack of responsibility.
  
  
• Along with directive, provide an incentive statement (e.g. "You may watch TV after you put your clothes back where they belong.")
  
  
• Do not expect your child to pick up toys and games that friends have left out; encourage the friends to help your child.
  
  
• Make certain that the responsibilities given to your child are appropriate for your child's level of development and ability.
  
  
• Make certain to be consistent when expecting your child to pick up toys. Do not leave the house with toys in the yard one time and expect the toys to be picked up the next time.
  
  
• Provide your child with shelving, containers, organizers, etc. for personal possessions. Label the storage areas and require your child to keep possessions organized.
  
  
• Discuss your child's responsibilities at the beginning of each day so he/she knows what is expected.
  
  
• Make certain there is a designated place in and around the house for all items.